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Interview with Mr. Resume (Ladies don’t feel bad)

Category: Resume Writing

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Reporter: Good day Mr. Resume. I have heard so much about you .What are you really?
Resume: I am a marketing piece, not an ‘obituary,’ I mean ‘career obituary.’

Reporter: What are you all about?
Resume: I contain information about you and your past jobs, how you fared in past jobs, which is an indicator of how you will perform in future jobs.

Reporter: You look a bit shabby, what can one do to make you look good and attractive.
Resume: Remove everything that has to do with “responsibilities included…” and replace it with on-the-job accomplishments.

Reporter: What is the commonest mistake people make?
Resume: Emm… committing suicide…

Reporter: I mean the commonest mistake people make about you.
Resume: Okay! Leaving out their job objective. This is just like leaving your house and suddenly you forget your destination.

Reporter: Can one add hobbies in you?
Resume: If the activity is related to the job objective for example mountain climbing may seem relevant for a security job but not for an accountant.

Reporter: Can one include his/her religious affiliations?
Resume: Hey! I do not like discrimination unless, I mean only if it supports your job objective such as indicating that you are a Christian if you are applying for the post of a church worker.

Reporter: can I fold you, so I can put you in an envelope.
Resume: when you have no other choice you can but please do not fold me along a line of text because the ink may flake off along the fold.

Reporter: I am running an academic program presently and I want to include it in you. What do I do?
Resume: you can use statements like these:
-Graduate studies in Business Administration, in progress
-Masters Degree in computer science anticipated May, 2009.

Reporter: What if one is over aged for a job and wants to avoid age discrimination.
Resume: In that scenario do not present your entire work history. You can simply label that part “relevant work history” or “recent work history” and describe only some years in the past. If something very important belongs to the distant past, you can add another paragraph titled “Prior relevant experience “and simply refer to the ancient job(s) without mentioning dates.

Reporter: What if someone wants to de-emphasize something that may not favor his application. What will he do?
Resume: That is a very important question.
Font color and formatting to the rescue. Since recruiters spend little time reading your resume, they end up focusing on highlighted or bulleted points.
Therefore, if a point does not really support your application and you have to include it in the resume, you may use a light colored font like ash and smaller font size to de-emphasize it. For example if you made a Third Class (I advise you to omit it, if possible) you can use a smaller font to type it; if you made a Second Class lower you many shorten it to Second Class; if you made a First Class /Distinction/Second Class Upper, please make it bold.

Reporter: What if …hold on the program time is up. Hello viewers, thanks for staying with us, stay tuned, next week, same time for another edition. Thank you Mr. Resume.

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